Category: blog
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I feel like I was a completely different person 20 years ago. Outgoing. Spontaneous. A friend to many. The life of any party. Loud. Now, not so much. I’m quiet in crowds. I can function in small groups, but I never want to “go first,” and I’m always paranoid I’ll say or do the wrong…
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There is a particular kind of shame that comes with repeating a mistake. Not once. Not accidentally. But knowingly. Again. And there is something humbling about realizing I wasn’t blindsided. I didn’t even really lack self control. I was patterned. For a long time, I thought insight would be enough. If I understood why I…
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This new generation loves to talk about boundaries. A healthy idea, in theory, except I’ve observed so many misconceptions around the topic. Establishing healthy boundaries versus building metaphorical walls. They’re not synonyms. Yes, both create distance. Both protect us. Both change how other people can access us. But boundaries keep us safe while still allowing…
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If you came to me hurting, I would listen carefully. If you told me you made a mistake, I would tell you with all sincerity that you’re human. I would reassure you that growth is not linear and that it takes time. If you admitted that you didn’t know better at the time, or that…
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I’m a paralegal. A really good one. And that’s not me tooting my own horn. That’s backed with accolades from higher ups and a salary to match. (That also does not make me special or ungrateful for the position I’ve been given, or the workload therein. I am humble every time my direct deposit hits,…
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I used to think that transformation was produced via hard discipline. Strict rules. A checklist. I’ve learned otherwise in the last 6 months. To be fair, 6 months isn’t a terribly long time. No major life haul took place. There was no public announcement. There was no dramatic reinvention or some sort of epiphany that…
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It seemed like a good idea. Yesterday. I made a decision at 9:12 p.m. A bold, responsible, almost admirable decision. “I am going to bed at 10:00.” I even said it out loud. To no one. Just the dog and the dishwasher. I listed the benefits in my head: Emotional stability. Less jaw clenching. Fewer…
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My old, broken vacuum has been recycled to fill a need besides suction. It was never a very good vacuum. Even when it worked. It wheezed more than it roared. It left a faint constellation of crumbs along the areas where the couches meet the floor, as if to remind me that perfection was never…
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The pictures hanging on my walls sometimes make me sad. They’re arranged carefully. Intentionally. As if balance could somehow soften history. A beach trip in 2021 – sunburned noses, wind-whipped hair, and everyone squinting at the same invisible horizon. Christmas morning in 2017 – wrapping paper mid-explosion, coffee forgotten on the counter, and joy so…
Raspberry Iced M 