Raspberry Iced M

Every Wednesday for the past couple of months, I have attended a small group Bible study called “Freedom.”

And it is changing my life.

There have been times in the last year or so when everything hard in my life felt like spiritual attacks.

Every struggle.
Every consequence.
Every uncomfortable situation.

“The enemy is attacking.”

And sometimes that is true.

But not everything is a demon. Some things are just decisions. The natural result of choices I’ve made.

Broken trust.
Damaged relationships.
Patterns that caught up with me.

And for a long time, it was easier to frame those things are warfare than it was to call them what they are – consequences.

Not punishment.
Not condemnation.
Just reality.

This distinction matters because mislabeling everything as “spiritual warfare” cuts off opportunities to grow. I start fighting the wrong battle. I resist instead of reflect, rebuke instead of take responsibility, and I pray for removal instead of doing the work required to change.

And that has kept me stuck in this loop of victimhood that I do not believe the Lord has intended for me. Or anyone else.

At the same time, not everything is just consequence. There is an internal battle that happens beneath the surface of circumstances.

That voice that says I’ll never change, that I’m still the same person, and “this” is who I am.

The pull back toward old patterns.
The temptation to escape instead of endure.
The urge to globally identify with the worst version of myself.

That part is not just consequence.
That’s a fight.

And I’m starting to recognize that the real battlefield isn’t my circumstances. It’s my mind. What I believe. What I come into agreement with. What I act upon.

And so I used to think of prayer as just having a conversation with God, asking for help, seeking peace, praising Him for His many blessings, and worshipping Him because He really is who He says He is.

But it’s so much more than that. It’s confrontation with my demons, too.

It’s saying, “God, You are still good,” to confront the lie that He’s not.
It’s, “I don’t have to return to who I used to be,” to challenge the lie that I’m stuck.
It’s, “I will choose differently,” to resist the pull to repeat old patterns.

The art of fighting demons isn’t about reacting to everything. It’s about discernment.

Knowing when to take responsibility, when to sit in consequences, and when to do internal work while also resisting lies, rejecting temptation, and standing in truth.

While some things need to be owned, other things need to be rebuked. And the devil is very crafty. Because the voice in my head that reminds me that I’m not good enough, that I’m fundamentally broken, that I don’t deserve grace or forgiveness or confidence or redemption? It doesn’t sound like the devil. It sounds like me.

I’m learning that real strength looks like both things – sitting in what I’ve caused and standing against what tries to pull me backwards.

Sometimes it’s not about fighting something outside of me. It’s about choosing what I agree with inside of me.

And every time I choose truth and responsibility…every time I do the next right thing…every time I choose to stay instead of run…

I’m fighting. Not loudly, but effectively.

And that kind of fight changes everything.