Raspberry Iced M

It is only after my children grew up that I recognized how little I appreciated my own parents. I know I wasn’t easy to raise. And I see that now – in a way I probably couldn’t have seen before.

I still call my father “Daddy.” He’ll be 61 this year, and after a stroke, an ankle surgery, and an upcoming knee replacement, I’m learning that parents are not invincible.

Upon reflection of my childhood, I made mental lists of some of the great things about each of my parents. And I’ll start with Daddy.

1. He raised me in church. My faith has evolved in 38 years, but who knows where I would be if not for the foundation Daddy set? Daddy taught me that there is power in prayer, power in worship, power in praise, and power in giving all control to the only One capable of taking care of my needs. I watched Daddy struggle. I saw him cry. I saw him lean on Jesus when things were out of his control. And now, I do something similar…with a lot less tact, I’m sure.
2. I inherited his love of music. My daddy has a beautiful voice. I’d post a video if I wasn’t worried about privacy. He led praise and worship, sang in the choir, sang specials, and he even still travels with a quartet. I can’t sing like him, but I enjoy listening. He also encouraged me to join band, and he attended most of my concerts and even some of my football games.
3. He surprised me with *NSYNC concert tickets. Twice. I know gifts are superfluous, but I am still an *NSYNC girlie. He got us tickets to the tour after the release of their first album the year I turned 13, and again the next year, when “No Strings Attached” came out. I was so lucky.
4. He taught me the value of hard work. Daddy was a truck driver for most of my childhood, and when I became a teenager, he started working at a flour mill that manufactured flour for pizza chains and other restaurants. He left for work before I left for school and got home just in time for dinner, covered in white dust. He never complained, but often made mention of how many flights of stairs he had to climb on any given workday. I believe I am a hard worker today because he taught me that nothing worth having is given freely.
5. He was a good provider. He worked and my stepmom stayed home. We always had what we needed. Clothes, shoes, toothpaste. Having been in a position, many times, where I had to choose between buying a Happy Meal or paying the water bill, I can’t imagine it was easy to take care of three kids financially. And what I thought I was “owed” as a child? That has now become “what Daddy gave.” Because the truth is that we aren’t owed squat.
6. He kept his expectations high. I won’t lie – Daddy was hard on me. If you talked to him today, he’d admit it. He had strict rules, some of which I didn’t understand as a teenager. I didn’t get to hang out with friends much. I couldn’t be around boys, really, outside of school. You wouldn’t catch me smoking in the shop behind the school or drinking on the weekends – because – well – I wasn’t there…because I wasn’t allowed. Now, I get it. Daddy knew the world was evil and cruel. And I think he wanted to keep me away from all of that for as long as possible. Maybe he knew that I was going to have an addictive personality. Or maybe he just wanted me to forego the struggles that he knew would come with adulthood. Either way, I look back with gratitude.
7. He is the first person I call when I need advice. Even today. If I’m having a tough day…if the kids are whipping my tail…if I need to know which choice is the best choice…my instinct is to call Daddy. ‘Cause he’ll probably know.
8. He taught me how to drive. Parallel parking. Three-point turns. Backing up. He might have told me once or twice that “I needed a dadgum bicycle,” but he taught me, none the less.
9. He let me go to four proms. I dated a junior/senior when I was a freshman/sophomore. I wasn’t technically allowed to “car date” at that time – that started when I was 16. But he let me go. He even made sure my hair was done and my shoes were dyed to match the color of my dress. What dad does that?!?
10. He forgave me when I spit on him. My hardheadedness didn’t start when I became an adult. It began much earlier. And I had a smart mouth and a lot of opinions to go with it. There were consequences for my bad behavior, yes, but Daddy also talked to me. He delivered many a lecture, just trying to explain things I couldn’t possibly understand at such a young age. He knew better – he knew more – and he gave me grace when I fell.

These are only ten things off the top of my head. There are many more. Maybe I’ll come back and edit this post as my brain dumps more information. Either way, I’m grateful for a father, today, that I haven’t always shown grat